Stop all the egg timers, cut off the television. Prevent Mel and Sue from barking juicy innuendo. It was my North, my South, my East and West. It was my working Wednesday’s rest. The pastry whirls are not wanted now, straighten every one. We are pain au choc-less. We are all patty, without bun. And so it is onwards that we must move. My friends, there is nothing left to prove.
Ahem, sorry, but like an un-piped profiterole I am but an empty shell now that the Great British Bake Off has hung up its apron for another tortuous year.
So imagine my unbridled delight when I got into work this morning. That’s because Southerly has mercifully filled a void within me and with any luck the millions of distraught Bake Off fans everywhere.
Ladles and gentlespoons, allow me to present to you, the (massively great) Southerly Bake Off.
Why do we love baking so much here at Southerly HQ?
Couldn’t tell you, but most lunchtimes I and several other members of the Southerly family will be found in our kitchen making an art form out of sandwich-construction.
We seem to have this insatiable need to make stuff in this office. Even then, revelling in the fruits of our ever-brilliant creations, we always seem to want more to satisfy whatever it is that burns inside us (could be indigestion), so inevitably we invent a competition around it.
The Southerly Bake Off: Round one
Given that Thursday morning debates of late have revolved around whether or not 40 seconds in midsummer heat could indeed melt a baked Alaska, naturally we gravitated towards filming our own Southerly Bake Off.
If anything it’s a chance to step away from behind the computer for a second, but it gives us an opportunity to introduce you properly to our lovely team. Awww.
So, without further ado, let me introduce you to our first contenders. Ding, ding – round one – kicking it off with a highly creative clash of the cupcakes.
Account Manager Jay Maranan knows her audience and is pulling no punches; unless you mean a rum punch, as Jay bakes up her boozy mojito cupcakes. Innovative. Which is difficult to say after three of them.
Meanwhile Anna Pestana, our administrative assistant, perhaps inspired by the girls off The Apprentice, opts for pure decadence. She bakes her signature red velvet cupcakes. Bejewelled, no less, by a 24-carat Oreo.
Art Director Anna Moumtzidou is our in-house judge, but hers is not the only vote we’re counting – we need YOU. Check out the video and decide for yourself.
Next week, Managing Editor David Drummond and Senior Account Manager Lucy Uren battle it out in the hotly contested field of brownies.
Tune in to The Southerly Bake Off on YouTube every Friday and extend those achey bakey dreams you thought were all but lost.